Fifteen years ago, my wife, Lisa, kissed our newborn son and left to buy nappies. But she never came back. Last week I saw her alive and well in the supermarket. What happened next, I’ll never forget.
I’ve spent the last 15 years searching for a resolution, raising my son Noah and trying to make sense of Lisa’s disappearance. But nothing could have prepared me for the moment I saw her again.
At first I thought I was dreaming. But after watching for a few minutes, I realised it was her. She was older and looked different, but her gestures were the same.
Before I tell you what happened next, let me take you back to when she suddenly disappeared.
It’s hard to describe what it feels like to lose someone without explanation. One moment they become a part of your life, and the next they’re just gone.
Fifteen years ago Lisa kissed our newborn son Noah on the forehead, picked up her purse and told me she was going to buy nappies. She didn’t take her phone. She didn’t leave a note. She just disappeared.
At first I thought she’d been in an accident. I drove towards the supermarket and looked for her on the way. I even checked the dark alleys, but she was nowhere to be seen.
Finding nothing, I called the police.
I hoped they would start an investigation, but those feelings were replaced with sadness when the police informed me that there were no leads.
Her phone was switched off and her bank accounts were untouched.
Eventually the police stopped investigating, thinking that she might have run away or suffered some tragic fate.
They even offered to let me move on with my life, but how could I?
Lisa wasn’t just my wife. She was my best friend. I couldn’t reconcile the loving woman I knew with a man who had abandoned his family.
As a result, I went through every possible option. Maybe she was in trouble and couldn’t come back. Maybe she ran off with someone else.
But none of them made sense.
For years I lived in a fog of anger and grief. I lay awake nights wondering where she was and why she left. Did she think I wasn’t good enough? Had she decided that Noah and I weren’t worth staying?
On the bad nights I convinced myself she was dead, and on the worst nights I hated her for leaving.
But life doesn’t stop because you’re heartbroken, does it?
Noah needed me at the time, and for his sake I had to pick myself up. It was hard, but with my mum’s support I learned how to change nappies and feed the baby. I even found the right way to make him burp.
As he got older, I became a pro at making lunches and was always available to help with homework. I became both father and mother to him, combining my full-time job with raising a child.
Noah is now 15 years old, tall and lanky, with a crooked grin that reminds me so much of Lisa. He is the light in my life and the reason I continue to live, even on the days when I miss Lisa the most.
There were times I imagined her walking through the door apologising for being late. It took me years to come to terms with the fact that my wife was never coming back. She was either dead or gone forever.
But everything changed when I saw her in the supermarket last week.
I was in the frozen food section, choosing between two brands of waffles, when I saw her. At first I thought my eyes were deceiving me.
The woman scanning the bag of frozen peas at the other end of the aisle looked exactly like Lisa. But that was impossible…wasn’t it?
I froze, staring at her as if I’d just seen a ghost
Her hair was shorter, a few strands of grey framing her face, but it was her. The way she stood and tilted her head to read the label was so familiar.
My heart raced as I realised what was happening.
Could it really be Lisa?
I doubted myself at first. Maybe I wanted to see her so badly that my mind was playing cruel tricks on me.
I pushed the trolley further down the aisle to get a closer look at her. At that moment, she turned slightly and I saw her face fully.
It was her, and now there was no mistaking it.
I quickly left the trolley and walked over to her. I stood behind her and took a deep breath.
‘Lisa?’ I called her by name for the first time in years.
She froze for a moment, then turned around. At first she just stared at me. Then, when realisation came, her eyes widened with shock.
‘Brian?’ – she whispered.
I couldn’t believe it was her.
After all these years, she was alive, standing right in front of me as if she had never left. Questions flashed through my head as I looked her over from head to toe
‘Lisa, what’s going on?’ I finally managed to speak. ‘Why are you here? Where have you been all this time?’
Her lips parted, as if she was about to say something, but hesitated. She looked around the aisle, clearly nervous.
‘Brian… I can explain,’ she began. ‘But first you have to forgive me.’
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Forgive her? For disappearing without a trace? For leaving me alone to raise our son?
‘Forgive you?’ I repeated. ‘Lisa, do you have any idea what you’re asking? Do you know what the last fifteen years have been like for me? For Noah?’
She looked down at the floor, avoiding my gaze. ‘I know. I know I’ve hurt both of you. But please let me explain.’
‘Explain,’ I said sharply. ‘Now.’
She took a deep breath and looked around nervously. ‘Not here,’ she said quietly, gesturing toward the shop entrance. ‘Follow me.’
She led me to the car park where a sleek black SUV was parked. It looked expensive, which was a far cry from the modest life we’d once shared.
As we approached her car, she turned to face me, tears glistening in her eyes
‘I didn’t mean to hurt you,’ she began. ‘I…I just couldn’t handle it.’
‘Handle what?’ snapped I snapped back, my patience wearing thin. ‘Being a mother? Being a wife? Living the life we built together?’
‘It wasn’t you, Brian,’ she cried. ‘It was me. I was scared. Scared of being a mother, of living from paycheck to paycheck, of never giving Noah the life he deserves. I felt like I was drowning.’
‘So you decided the best solution was to abandon us?’ I asked, raising my voice. ‘Do you have any idea what you put us through?’
Tears streamed down her face as she nodded.
‘I know, and I hate myself for it. I thought I was doing the right thing. I told myself I’d come back when I had something to give.’
‘Where have you been all these years?’ I asked.
‘I went to Europe,’ she replied, not meeting my gaze. ‘My parents helped me leave. They didn’t tell you because they thought you were holding me back. They never approved of our marriage. They didn’t like you.’
That’s when I started connecting the dots. Her parents had barely helped me care for Noah after she left. They didn’t even keep in touch for a long time.
‘I changed my name, went back to school and built a career,’ she continues, her voice shaking. ‘I’m a business consultant now, and I came back to this town because I wanted to see you and Noah. I never imagined I’d run into you in a supermarket. I-’
‘You wanted to see us?’ repeated I. ‘Really, Lisa? You think you can make things right by coming back into our lives?’
‘I have the money Noah needs to live a full life, Brian. I have enough money to give him everything he deserves.’
I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe Lisa thought she could just walk back into our lives with a bag of money and remorse.
‘Did you think your money was going to fix everything?’ – I asked. asked me.
‘No, I didn’t think it would fix everything, but I had to try. Please, Brian. At least let me see Noah.’
‘No,’ I said firmly, stepping back. ‘You have no right to break his life after fifteen years. You can’t rewrite the past because you finally decided to get a conscience.’
Her tears poured nonstop, but I didn’t care. All I could think about were the nights I’d been up with a crying baby, the years I’d struggled to make ends meet, and the countless times Noah had asked why his mum wasn’t around.
‘I’m so sorry,’ she whispered, her voice trailing off. ‘I didn’t know what else to do.’
‘And I do,’ I said, my voice cold. ‘Noah and I have moved on. We don’t need you anymore, Lisa.’
Without another word, I turned and walked away.
She kept begging me to stop, but I’d had enough. I couldn’t let her come into our lives and ruin everything.
Do you think I did the right thing? What would you do if you were me?
