I felt betrayed, humiliated and completely lost!
Later that evening, my husband came home with the same guilty expression on his face.
He stood in the doorway of our bedroom with his hands in his pockets while I sat cross-legged on the bed, waiting for him to speak.
Lizzie,’ he began quietly, ’I’m sorry.
I took that money, okay?
I just really want to go on this trip.
It’s really important to me.
Slowly it began to dawn on me what was going on here.
A few days ago, he was telling me about this unique opportunity to go fishing with friends and some ‘real pros’.
He was OVERWHELMED by this fishing trip!
I understand, Ethan, but we can’t afford it right now,’ I said then as we sat at the kitchen table that night.
We have bills to pay and my trip to Europe is coming up.
Can’t you just wait until next year?
He looked disappointed then, but nodded nonetheless.
Yeah, you’re probably right.
It’s just… they said it’s going to be amazing, and I don’t want to miss it.
But I understand.
We’ll have to settle for a day trip to the local lake.
I thought that was the end of the conversation, but I had no idea Ethan had other plans!
Now I was staring at him, feeling my heart pounding frantically in my chest.
You KNEW I was going to visit my father’s grave in three weeks, Ethan.
You knew how much it meant to me.
How could you do that!
He sighed:
I know, and I’m sorry.
But I’ll pay you back in a month.
You can postpone your trip a bit, right?
It’s just… this fishing trip is really important to me!
I looked at him in total shock.
He was seriously asking me to postpone my trip to my father’s grave so HE could go fishing!
The anger I had felt before was nothing compared to the rage that was now bubbling up inside me!
‘Unbelievable,’ I muttered and shook my head.
‘You really mean it!’
He nodded, almost hoping I would agree.
‘The trip is scheduled in a few days, and I’ll only be gone for a week,’ he explained.
But I had other plans…
The next day I woke up and a plan began to form in my head.
I called my supervisor and asked if I could take my holiday early.
To my relief, she agreed and said it wasn’t a problem.
While Ethan was at work, I spent the morning packing up his new fishing gear.
I packed the boat, reels, tackle – just everything!
Loaded everything into the car and drove back to the shop.
The salesman who was there yesterday looked at me in surprise.
‘Hello, I’d like to return all of this,’ I said, trying to keep my voice steady.
He raised an eyebrow.
‘Return everything? Is there something wrong with the merchandise?’
‘No, I just changed my mind,’ I replied with a strained smile.
The salesman didn’t ask too many questions and processed the return.
When he handed me the money, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of satisfaction.
But I wasn’t done yet.
‘Actually,’ I said, leaning a little closer, ’I have some more fishing equipment I’d like to sell.’
His eyes lit up.
‘Of course, we’re always happy to buy used equipment.’
I went back to the car and brought every piece of equipment Ethan owned for fishing.
When I left the shop, I had an additional two thousand dollars in my pocket and a sense of triumph I hadn’t felt in a long time!
Back home, I packed my suitcase with the essentials, cast one last look at our house, and headed for the airport.
I didn’t see the point in leaving a note.
Ethan would find out soon enough!
The flight to Europe seemed like a dream!
I stared out the window most of the time as my thoughts swirled around everything that had happened.
I didn’t know what the future held for my marriage, but at this moment, I didn’t care.
The only thing that mattered was to finally visit my father’s grave and find the farewell I so desperately needed.
The next day I arrived at the cemetery and stood in front of my father’s headstone.
I knelt down and placed a bouquet of daisies, his favourite flowers, at the foot of the stone.
My eyes filled with tears, but this time they were tears of relief.
‘I finally made it, Daddy.’
As I sat there, I thought about my husband and wondered if he would be angry when he came home and saw the empty wardrobe, the missing gear, and the silence in the house.
Part of me felt guilty for leaving him like that, but another part of me felt free.
For too long I had put his needs before my own, but NOW I was doing something for me!
Something I needed to do to heal.
When I got back to the small hotel room I’d booked, my phone vibrated with an incoming message.
It was Ethan.
‘Elizabeth, where are you? I came home and everything is gone. Please talk to me?’
I stared at the message, feeling heavy on my heart.
I knew I would have to confront him sooner or later, but I needed this time now – to be alone with my thoughts, to mourn and figure out what to do next.
I put the phone aside.
The road ahead was uncertain, but one thing was certain: I was finally at peace.