‘Damien, we need to talk,’ I said, my voice trembling despite my best efforts to remain calm.
He looked up at me, and for a moment, fear flashed in his eyes. ‘What’s going on, Lacey?’ he asked, his voice wary.
‘I saw you last night,’ I said, trying to keep my voice steady. ‘I know about the letter, Damien. I saw you crying. Please, just tell me what’s going on.’
The colour drained from his face, and for a moment I thought he was going to faint. He set his coffee cup down, his hands shaking, and stared at the table.
‘Lacey, I didn’t want you to find out this way,’ he whispered.
‘What’s in the letter?’ I asked, leaning forward. ‘Please just tell me the truth.’
He took a deep breath. ‘I’ve been diagnosed with something,’ he finally said, his voice so quiet I could barely hear him. ‘It’s… it’s not good, Lacey.’
My heart pounded. ‘What do you mean? What’s wrong?’
Damien looked at me, his eyes filling with tears. ‘It’s cancer,’ he said, his voice breaking. ‘Terminal. The doctors gave me six months, maybe less.’
I felt as if the floor had been pulled out from under me. The room spun, and I had to grab the edge of the table to stay on my feet.
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ I whispered, my voice breaking. ‘Why did you try to hide this from me?’
He reached out and took my hand in his, his grip weak and trembling. ‘Because I didn’t want you to go through this,’ he said, tears streaming down his face. “I didn’t want you to see me die. I thought… I thought that if I could keep it to myself, maybe it would be easier for you.”
‘Easier?’ I repeated, my voice rising in disbelief. ‘How could you think that by shutting me out, you would make it easier? We’re supposed to be a team, Damien. We’re supposed to face everything together. You can’t just decide to go through this alone.’
‘I know,’ he whispered, his voice full of regret. “I know, and I’m so sorry, my love. I was scared. I didn’t want you to see me like this, weak and broken. I thought I could protect you, but all I did was hurt you.”
I grabbed him and hugged him tightly, trying to hold back the tears that threatened to spill.
‘You don’t have to protect me from this, baby. I’m your wife. I want to be with you, no matter what happens. We’ll get through this together, okay? No more secrets.’
He nodded, hugging me back, his eyes full of gratitude and sadness. ‘I don’t deserve you, Lacey,’ he whispered, his voice choked with emotion. ‘But I’m so glad I have you.’
We held each other for a long time, crying over everything we were about to lose. I knew the road ahead would be unbearably difficult, but I also knew we would walk it together.
After that, I couldn’t stop thinking about how much time we had lost, how many moments we could have spent together if he had just told me the truth. But I knew that thinking about it wouldn’t change anything. What mattered now was that we were together.
Weeks passed, and I noticed changes in Damien, both physical and emotional. He began to open up more, sharing his fears and experiences with me! We spent our days trying to make the most of the time we had left, finding small joys in everyday moments!
We went for walks in the park, had movie nights at home, and even started making a list of things we wanted to do together before it was too late! One day, as we sat on the porch admiring the sunset, my husband turned to me with a sad smile.
‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about this sooner, Lacey,’ he said quietly. ‘I wasted so much time hiding from you, from us.’
I shook my head, squeezing his hand. “Don’t think about that now, baby. We’re here together, and that’s what matters. We can’t change the past, but we can make the most of the time we have left.”
He nodded, tears glistening in his eyes. ‘I don’t want to leave you,’ he whispered, his voice breaking. “But I’m so grateful for the time we’ve had. You made these last few months bearable, my bunny. I don’t know how I would have managed without you.”
Tears welled up in my eyes as I leaned over and rested my head on his shoulder.
‘You don’t have to do anything alone anymore, my angel. I am here with you every step of the way.’
We sat there, embracing each other, as the sun sank below the horizon. At that moment, I realised something important. I had decided to catch Damien in a lie, convinced that he was hiding something terrible from me.
And although I uncovered a truth that was far more devastating, it also brought us closer together than we had been in many years. However much time we had left, we would face it together, side by side, as we always should have.