Shirley entrusted her younger brother with looking after their mother when she moved abroad. She believed that he cared enough about her to provide constant care. But her life plans changed when she returned a year later to visit her mother.
Shirley, 40, worked as a nurse in the US. She moved abroad from her hometown in search of better opportunities. Before moving, she lived with her aging mother, who had no intention of moving into a nursing home.
Shirley flew home every year to visit her mother and younger brother. Over the years, she noticed that her mother was finding it increasingly difficult to take care of herself, so she decided to meet with her younger brother Alex, who had just graduated from university earlier that year.
“Mom needs someone to live with her full-time. I can’t take her with me because I live with my son and husband in a small apartment,” she said.
“How about visiting her every weekend and making sure the house is clean and she has food? I don’t want to live in the country with Mom,” he replied. Shirley agreed, but she was still worried about her mother.
Three years passed, and her brother kept his promise to visit their mother every weekend. But when Shirley returned for the holidays that year, her 65-year-old mother seemed too frail to live on her own.
“We need to come up with another plan,” Shirley said to her brother. “Mom can’t live alone anymore.” Alex agreed, but didn’t want to move to the countryside. “Maybe you could move in with her, and I’ll send you money every month so you can take care of yourself and Mom,” Shirley suggested.
Her brother was more receptive to the suggestion, hoping that the money would be enough for the essentials and entertainment. “I hope it will be enough for both of you,” Shirley said. Alex promised to return home and take care of their mother.
When Shirley left for the United States, she worried about whether her brother would be able to take proper care of their mother. She knew he liked to hang out with his friends, but she hoped he would keep his promises — after all, she was their mother.
As promised, she sent him money every month. It wasn’t a large amount, but it was enough to take care of both of them.
However, instead of moving in with his mother, Alex continued to visit her every weekend and spent the rest of the money on himself. Shirley’s mother wanted to contact her daughter and tell her the truth, but she didn’t want to cause her any additional stress.
A year later, it was time for Shirley to visit her family again, but she decided to come on a different day to surprise her relatives. When she arrived home for the holidays, she was shocked to find her mother alone.
“Where’s Alex? Shouldn’t he be taking care of you?” Shirley asked. Her mother told her that Alex visited her from time to time, but he never moved in with her.
Shirley was furious. Every time she talked to her brother, he promised to take care of their mother. Just as she was trying to figure out her brother’s lies, he walked into the house and was surprised to see Shirley and her family there. “Hi, sis, what a surprise. Why are you back so early?” Alex asked.
“You promised to take care of Mom, why did you leave her alone?” Shirley asked.
“There are so many old people in this village who live on their own, and they’re fine; even Mom has been fine all this time,” he replied.
When Shirley asked Alex what he had been doing with the money she had been sending him all year, his mother told her that he had been using it to gamble with his friends every weekend. “He became popular in the village because he always had extra money to gamble with,” she said.
Saddened by what her mother had told her, Shirley talked to her husband in private. “I think we should take Mom to live with us,” she said. Her husband wanted to take her in, but he was concerned about their financial situation.
“We can sell this house and use the money to buy a bigger apartment,” Shirley suggested.
Fearing that her brother would want his share of the money, she secretly asked her mother, who agreed to move in with them and sell the house without Alex’s knowledge.
At the end of the visit, Shirley told Alex not to worry about their mother anymore. “Our neighbor will come and take care of her every day until we decide what to do with her,” Shirley said.
“Take her to a nursing home. She’ll be fine there,” Alex replied.
Shirley was very disappointed in her younger brother, but she was confident that her plan would work. As soon as she and her family returned to the United States, she began the process of selling the house as quickly as possible.
Three months later, Shirley was standing at the airport waiting for her mother to land. In preparation for her arrival, she, her husband, and her son took the money from the sale and moved into a more spacious apartment.
Shirley felt relieved that her mother would be living with her. She knew she would be able to take care of her, and her mother would not have to live alone. She was grateful for the opportunity to spend time with her grandson and the rest of her family.
What can we learn from this story?
- Trust must be earned, regardless of family ties. Shirley trusted her brother before she went abroad; Alex broke that trust by lying to her that he would take care of their mother.
- Family members take care of each other. Although Shirley’s husband was concerned about their financial situation, he agreed to take in his mother-in-law because it is very important to care for elderly people when they can no longer care for themselves.
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